Tough Questions In OA Recovery Workshop

• Read this entire document.
• Find, print, and/or download the resources mentioned in this workshop script in the Document Library on oa.org:
  • Serenity Prayer (in English, though other languages are encouraged)
  • Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous
  • Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous
  • What Is an Outside Issue: Are We Being Open-Minded in Our Meetings?
  • Unity with Diversity Policy Statements, including statement on specific focus meetings
  • The OA Promise (I Put My Hand in Yours)
• If interpretation will be offered, be prepared to show or distribute all referenced documents in each relevant language. (The Workshop Script assumes that interpretation will be offered.)
• The lead moderator’s script calls for the Serenity Prayer to be said in one language other than English at the beginning and in multiple languages other than English at the closing. Recruit volunteers to read these (preferably people who speak the language chosen) and prepare written versions for screen sharing in virtual workshops. The workshop team is responsible for the choice of languages.
• Recruit volunteer breakout room moderators for small group discussions. If you anticipate forty or fewer participants, you will need three breakout room moderators: one for each tough question. Be prepared to add additional moderators and breakout spaces (virtual or in-person) as needed. The suggested breakout group size is ten to twelve to allow for full participation. Note: Since topics will be rotated between rooms, the breakout room moderators can either move between breakout rooms to follow “their question” as it rotates, or they can stay in a specific breakout room and moderate two different tough questions.
• Recruit a volunteer to time moderator summaries and member shares during the closing session.
• If your group needs additional or alternative tough questions to meet its specific needs, see our list of “Additional Tough Questions” at the end of this workshop. 
• If the workshop is held virtually:
  • Recruit a volunteer to act as chat monitor.
  • Recruit co-hosts who will be responsible for sending attendees to breakout rooms, muting and unmuting volunteer readers, and screen sharing any documents read. (Practice these actions if necessary.)
  • Arrange for the number of virtual breakout rooms needed. This workshop template uses three rooms total: the main room and two additional breakout rooms. (Please be sure that the co-hosts know how to move people into and out of the rooms.)
  • Set up the meeting so that attendees are automatically muted and the chat function is set to include hosts and co-hosts only. (See the “Tools for Chat Monitor” section below.) 
  • Decide whether you will mention the availability of digital applications for translation and/or closed captioning. If yes, identify them and include instructions in both the “Workshop Script for Lead Moderator” and “Tools for Chat Monitor” sections below.
• If the workshop is held in-person:
  • Consider how you will enable participants to read and follow along with the resources from oa.org mentioned in this workshop script, especiallyWhat Is an Outside Issue? (e.g. printed copies, posters, projected slides).
  • Make sure to clearly communicate with the facility where the workshop is held. Ask what specific rooms or spaces may be used for main discussion and the breakout room sessions. 
  • Provide signs to identify which specific topics will be discussed in which rooms during each round of discussion. (Take into account that topics will be rotated between rooms.)
  • If interpretation will be offered, the interpreter will stay in the main room while the topics rotate between rooms. This way, people who need an interpreter will be able to stay in the main room and still participate in multiple discussions.

• Recruit volunteers to read the resources below when they are mentioned in the workshop script (all available to read and download from the Document Library on oa.org):
  • Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous
  • Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous
  • What Is an Outside Issue: Are We Being Open-Minded in Our Meetings?
  • Unity with Diversity Policy Statements, including statement on specific focus meetings
  • The OA Promise (I Put My Hand in Yours)
• Check in with the volunteers reading the Serenity Prayer, both in English and in the language(s) chosen by the workshop team.
• Check in with breakout room moderators.
• Check in with interpreter(s), if needed.
• Check in with the timer.
• If the workshop is held virtually:
  • Check in with chat monitor(s). Provide them with the information they will need to post in the chat. (See “Tools for Chat Monitor” section below.)
  • Check in with co-hosts and remind them how to send attendees to breakout rooms, mute and unmute the volunteer readers, and where to find the resources they will be responsible for posting or screen sharing. 

The chat monitor needs to post the following information in the chat box when mentioned by the lead moderator:

• Attendees are automatically muted.
• We ask that you keep what you see and hear at this workshop confidential. This means no video recordings or screen captures. Please respect the anonymity of all who attend.
• Please stop your video if you are walking around or eating.
• We ask that you rename yourself to first name and last initial. Feel free to add your state, province, or country.
• Please note that chat is set so it can only be used by hosts and co-hosts.

Note: Instructions are noted in italics and/or brackets as needed.

Opening (20 minutes)

Lead Moderator: “Welcome everyone. My name is _______. I am a _______ [compulsive eater and/or other identifier] and I will be your lead moderator for this session.” 

For virtual workshops: The lead moderator should share this information, which the chat monitor will also post in the chat:

Lead Moderator: “Please note, as it says in the chat:

• “Attendees are automatically muted.
• “We ask that you keep what you see and hear at this workshop confidential. This means no video recordings or screen captures. Please respect the anonymity of all who attend
• “Please stop your video if you are walking around or eating.
• “We ask that you rename yourself to first name and last initial. Feel free to add your state, province, or country.
• “Please note that chat is set so it can only be used by hosts and co-hosts.”

Virtual workshops: When appropriate, a co-host should unmute participants who have been assigned readings. Be sure to provide co-hosts time to post the individual readings before the volunteer readers begin.

Lead Moderator: “Let us start with the Serenity Prayer in English which _______ [name of volunteer] will read. 

“Now we ask _______ [name of volunteer] to read it in _______ [language other than English].” 

Virtual workshops: Screen share the Serenity Prayer in both languages.

Lead Moderator: “This workshop is called Tough Questions in OA Recovery. We have one goal today: to help each attendee discover what emotions and beliefs within themselves encourage practicing the Steps and Traditions in a loving, inclusive, and welcoming way. This workshop emphasizes OA’s commitment to everyone being welcome at our meetings. We find that an honest look at ourselves helps enhance our recovery and enables us to carry the OA message of spiritual growth.

“I have asked _______ [name of volunteer] to read What Is an Outside Issue? This document was created by the OA Board of Trustees and Unity with Diversity Conference Committee.”

In-person workshops: Show What Is an Outside Issue? to the workshop attendees. If you have decided to make copies of this document, distribute them now.

Virtual workshops: Screen share What Is an Outside Issue?

Lead Moderator: “I have asked _______ [name of volunteer] to read the Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous.” 

Virtual workshops: Screen share the Twelve Steps.

Lead Moderator: “I have asked _______ [name of volunteer] to read the Twelve Traditions of Overeaters Anonymous.”

Virtual workshops: Screen share the Twelve Traditions.

Lead Moderator: “As we extend the hand and heart of the OA Fellowship to those who still suffer, let us be mindful of OA’s Unity with Diversity Policy, which respects our differences, yet unites us in the solution to our common problem. Whatever problem you may have with food, you are welcome at this meeting, regardless of race, creed, nationality, religion, gender identity, sexual orientation, or any other attribute.^[1]

“Some of the discussion here today might make you feel uncomfortable; however, avoiding discussion of these ideas can lead us to compulsive eating. 

“Please remember that while our Traditions state that OA as a whole has no opinion on outside issues, you are welcome to share about whatever impacts your recovery. As you share your experience in OA, please also share your strength and hope while observing the OA Twelve Traditions and the OA Unity with Diversity policy.

“Our agenda for today will include the following: 

“There will be three breakout room discussions, one in the main room and two in additional rooms, each with their own breakout room moderator. You are free to choose whichever room you like, depending on the tough question you are interested in.

“After the first round of twenty-five to thirty minutes, we will bring you all back to this main room where you will get the opportunity to choose your second room with a different tough question. 

“After the second round of another twenty-five to thirty minutes, we will once again bring you all back to this main room. Each breakout room moderator will then summarize their group’s discussion and findings. After that, we will move on to open floor sharing before we close the workshop.”

Note: The “Moderator Tough Questions” section contains the original questions for this workshop. For alternative questions to potentially replace these, check out the “Additional Tough Questions” section at the end of this document. 

1. “The first breakout room group here in the main room will explore the need for specific-focus meetings. [Or replace with alternate question from “Additional Tough Questions” section at the end of this document.]
   “_______ [name of volunteer] will facilitate the conversation on specific-focus meetings.” [Or alternate question.]
2. “The second breakout room group will address what is or is not considered an outside issue. [Or replace with alternate question.]
   “_______ [name of volunteer] will facilitate the conversation on defining outside issues.” [Or alternate question.]
3. “The third breakout room group will focus on why, in our OA meetings, there is a need to discuss how social issues and current events affect our compulsive eating.” [Or replace with alternate question.]
   “_______ [name of volunteer] will facilitate the conversation on how social issues and current events affect our compulsive eating.” [Or alternate question.]

Lead Moderator: “As we said, we will be using the main room as the first breakout room. We will have an interpreter available in this main room. Discussion topics will rotate through breakout rooms so that anyone needing interpretation in the main room can participate in different discussion topics throughout the workshop. 

“Please remember to respect each other’s anonymity. We want this to be a safe place for all to share openly.

“As a disclaimer: This is a discussion workshop where you are encouraged to speak freely on how these outside issues might affect your recovery from compulsive eating. Because outside issues are being discussed, please stay on topic, and please only share your personal experience, strength, and hope relating to that topic.

“Our common disease and our common purpose unite us. OA is strengthened when we honor and respect everyone and all our different approaches to recovery by practicing unity through diversity. Before the first session, _______ [name of volunteer] is going to read the full Unity with Diversity Statement as distributed from the World Service Office this year.”

[Virtual workshops: “_______ [name of volunteer] is going to share this on screen shortly.”]

Session One (25 to 30 minutes)

Sessions should last approximately twenty-five minutes, with five minutes allotted for attendees to choose a new discussion topic and travel, either physically or virtually, between rooms.

Lead Moderator: “It is now time for our first session. You can now choose to either stay in the main room or join one of the other breakout rooms. As a reminder, those using interpretation, please stay in this main room.

“To summarize, the rooms for this session are:

• “Main Room: Why is there a need for specific-focus meetings in OA? 
• “Breakout Room 1: What is an outside issue in OA? 
• “Breakout Room 2: During OA meetings, why is there a need to discuss how social issues and current events affect our compulsive eating?”

Session Two (25 to 30 minutes)

When everyone is back in the main room from the first session:

Lead Moderator: “Welcome back! It is now time for the second session, so please head to the room of your choice to discuss a different tough question, or feel free to stay with your original tough question. 

“To summarize, the rooms for this session are:

• “Main Room: What is an outside issue in OA? A reminder for those using interpretation: Please stay in this main room.
• “Breakout Room 1: During OA meetings, why is there a need to discuss how social issues and current events affect our compulsive eating?
• “Breakout Room 2: Why is there a need for specific-focus meetings in OA?”

Final Session: Recap and Open Sharing (40 minutes)

When the breakout sessions are completed:

Lead Moderator: “Welcome back. _______ [name of volunteer] will read the Serenity Prayer for us.”

Virtual workshops: Screen share the Serenity Prayer.

“Now our breakout room moderators will give us summaries of their breakout room discussions, which will last up to eight minutes each: first _______ [name], then _______ [name], and finally _______ [name]. Our timer [name of volunteer] will signal to you when your time is up.”

Timekeeper will signal each person when they reach eight minutes.

Lead Moderator: “To quote pages 19 and 20 of the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, ‘Most of us sense that real tolerance of other people’s shortcomings and viewpoints and a respect for their opinions are attitudes which make us more useful to others.’^[1]

“Now is the time for open sharing. You are welcome to tell us where you are from and how long you’ve been in OA. Please keep your comments in the first person and focus on your personal recovery from compulsive eating.

“Please remember that while our Traditions state that OA as a whole has no opinion on outside issues, for this workshop, you are welcome to share on whatever impacts your recovery. As you share your experience and strength in OA, please also share your hope.

“Feedback, cross talk, and advice-giving are discouraged here. Cross talk during an OA meeting is giving advice to others who have already shared, speaking directly to another person rather than to the group, and questioning or interrupting the person speaking or sharing at the time.

“Shares are two to three minutes each, and our timer [name of volunteer] will signal to you when your time is up.”

[For virtual workshops: “If you want to share, raise your virtual hand in your meeting controls. If you are on a phone, press *9. I will call on you. When it is your turn to speak, you will see a prompt on your screen asking you to unmute. Please select ‘unmute’ to speak. If you need help, please message one of our hosts or co-hosts.”]

Lead Moderator: “The floor is now open for sharing.”

Timekeeper will signal each person when they reach three minutes.

Closing (3 to 5 minutes before the workshop is scheduled to end)

Lead Moderator: “It is now time to close our workshop. Thank you for your honest opinions and participation. We hope that you experienced something positive during this workshop and have gained understanding and acceptance of what others are thinking and experiencing.

“The opinions expressed here today are those of individual OA members and do not represent OA as a whole. Please remember our commitment to honor each other’s anonymity. Whom you see here, what you hear here, when you leave here, let it stay here.

“After a moment of silence, we will end with the OA Promise, followed by the Serenity Prayer in the [language choices] languages.”

[For virtual workshops: “_______ [name of volunteer] will screen share for us.”]

“Keep coming back. It works if you work it, so work it. You’re worth it!” 

---

^[1] From the Suggested Meeting Format on oa.org (https://oa.org/documents/suggested-meeting-format/)
^[2] Alcoholics Anonymous, 4^th ed. (Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc., © 2001) pp. 19-20

These are the original questions chosen for the workshop. Feel free to choose from “Additional Tough Questions” in the next section below or create your own tough questions that might apply better to your service body and meetings in your area. 

Note: These questions were provided by individual OA members and are not a reflection of OA as a whole.

1. What is the purpose of specific-focus meetings in OA? 
   • Why do some people feel the need to create separate meetings (e.g., Black, Indigenous, and People of Color (BIPOC), Ebony, men- or women-only, LGBTQIA+, etc.) if we all have the same disease and a common solution?
   • Why are there so many different versions of OA meetings (e.g., OA-HOW, 90-Day, etc.)? 
   • Who attends and takes service positions in specific-focus meetings?
2. What is an outside issue in OA meetings?
   • What exactly is an outside issue, and how do we make people feel comfortable sharing strong feelings? How do we help people feel that their experiences and emotions are valued?
   • During periods of racial tension internationally, fellows have shared how these events have severely affected their program, and they have felt censored when told they cannot bring the topic up during shares as some consider it an outside issue. 
3. During OA meetings, why is there a need to discuss how social issues and current events affect our compulsive eating?
   • What do you do when someone starts talking about who they plan to vote for in the next election?
   • How can I share my experience without making a political statement? Should I leave out names or other specifics?
   • Are political discussions allowed before my meeting starts? After? How do I help keep people focused on recovery?
   • Current events are making me want to seek ease and comfort in food. How do I share about this in my meeting without breaking Traditions?

This is a collection of topic questions that presenters might choose for the workshop. Feel free to create your own tough questions that might apply better to your service body and meetings in your area. 

Note: These questions were provided by individual OA members and are not a reflection of OA as a whole.

1. Why aren’t more face-to-face meetings happening in my area? What is stopping or preventing face-to-face meetings from existing?
2. If a member cannot find an in-person meeting in their area that addresses their diverse needs, is it their responsibility to start a meeting? 
3. My service meeting does not practice “raising hands to be called on,” and people often talk over each other. How do I appropriately address this?
4. Why aren’t there more underrepresented populations in OA? How can we attract them? What can Overeaters Anonymous do as a whole to attract more underrepresented populations to our rooms? 
5. How can I be more welcoming to a fellow from an underrepresented background without offending them? 
6. What efforts are our service bodies making to reach underrepresented populations? 
7. How can we encourage a fellow who wants to be more consistent in giving service?
8. How can we encourage rotation of service? 
9. Am I allowed to attend specific-focus meetings if I do not identify with the specific focus? 
10. How can we encourage group members to reach out to people outside of their inner circle of friends? 
11. Why does our service body not have a diversity committee?
12. How do I know I will feel safe sharing in a meeting?
13. How can we make sure everyone feels seen and included in meetings where people have different belief systems?
14. How can we provide a safe place for everyone to share equally?
15. What is the best way to address gender-affirming pronouns?
16. How can we communicate the importance of inclusion?
17. How do we share our feelings about events in the news without violating Tradition Ten?
18. I am doing a Tenth Step on a resentment over an argument with someone on the topic of “woke-ism.” Am I allowed to say that word in my share?
19. The leader or moderator of my meeting is not using my preferred pronouns. How do I express this?
20. In an open meeting, a person that does not yet recognize themselves as an OA member was sharing. Somebody said that they were not allowed to share unless they were an OA member. How would you deal with this situation? 
21. When a visibly over- or under-weight member takes a prominent service position, I feel uncomfortable and worry newcomers might be confused or discouraged. What should I do?
22. How do you deal with a fellow who works in the addiction field and constantly brings this up in meetings? 
23. I am fearful of sharing my views on race, gender, and secular meetings, including how these views are affecting my abstinence. I am afraid of being labeled negatively. How can I share my fears and beliefs openly without violating Tradition Ten?
24. People have entered our online meeting and used offensive language toward me when I am sharing. The Traditions are in place to provide me with a safe place to recover from compulsive eating. What can I do to feel safe again in meetings? How can my group and/or fellows support me?
25. How do we handle members who are not respectful of a person’s gender identity?
26. When someone says in meetings to “tone down the use of the word diversity” (or even remove the word altogether), how can I respond objectively and respectfully? What approved pieces of OA literature and policy may I reference?
27. Online meetings often ask members to unmute and say the Serenity Prayer, and many members enjoy the feelings of connectivity and warmth of saying it all together. But some members are sensitive to hearing multiple speakers and/or sounds. How can we help those members feel comfortable and connected?
28. How do I deal with a fellow who criticizes Twelve Step recovery and/or Overeaters Anonymous in meetings but keeps coming back? 
29. Why do some meetings require having your camera on during an online meeting and others do not? 
30. I was told that discussing racism is an outside issue. How should I respond? How should a group respond?
31. If I only attend virtual meetings, is my abstinence as valid as the abstinence of members who attend face-to-face meetings?
32. What’s wrong with trying to convert atheists and agnostics to a belief in God? 
33. How can we be more welcoming to atheists and agnostics? 
34. If atheists and agnostics can define a Higher Power any way they want, why can’t they just say the word “god” and know “god” is just another word meaning the Higher Power of their understanding?
35. In my experience, belief in God is essential for recovery; how do non-believers find recovery and abstinence? 
36. What OA resources can we offer a newcomer if they are uncomfortable with the word “God”?